Old man take a look at my life
I’m a lot like you.

My buddy Joe decided to get some coffee beans that were eaten, digested, and SHAT out of some kind of monkey-cat-weasel-looking-thing called a Civet.  People walk around the jungle and collect the poop, then roast it up.  This stuff goes for about $400.00 a pound.  No shit.  (pun indented)  We got a VERY small amount and it was $60.00.  We bought a new grinder, we brought distilled water to 180 degrees, we pre-heated a french press, and brewed it up.  I figured that you buy this $400 dollar a pound coffee and some ass in New Jersey goes to Costco and sells you some “Kopi Luwak” which is really Columbian coffee roasted by some guy named Fred in Jersey City.  Well, I was wrong.   One taste of this coffee and you are 100% positive that it’s NOT normal coffee.  Without a doubt, the finest coffee that I have ever tasted, and the 6 or so people that got a taste all agreed.  It’s freaking incredible coffee.  All flavor, no bitterness, no aftertaste.  It’s perfect.  I highly recommend trying it, so that like me, your next cup of $10 a pound coffee that you’ve loved for years will taste like asphalt comparatively. We took pics of the process and also of Thumb enjoying his $20 cup of coffee Read about the poo-coffee!

http://shavemyyeti.com/index.html

Used to be the hairy guy
Now he’s got a brighter sky
Tamin’ ladies with his eye
He’s shaved!
No more itch-i-ness
Is making him dan-gerous
Or a mortal threat to folks like you and I.
Gonna try and make it now
Make Seattle his somehow
Who knows what the future holds - we’ll see.
Used to be the hairy guy
Now he’s got a brighter sky
There’s just no stopping Shaved Yeti!

Look kids!! A straw man!

The fact that there are people out there who are chuckling at how right this video is genuinely terrifies me.

And if I was The Shat, I’d me dropping a photon torpedo of pain on their faces for what they’ve done to Kirk.

I’ve been reading the famous old book, Flatland, by Edward Abbot, and that’s what inspired this impromptu Photoshop creation.

If Democrats Had Any Brains, They’d Be Republicans, by Anne Coulter (Random House)

“Uttering lines that send liberals into paroxysms of rage, otherwise known as ‘citing facts,’ is the spice of life. When I see the hot spittle flying from their mouths and the veins bulging and pulsing above their eyes, well, that’s when I feel truly alive.”

1.) Attention whore.

2.) No flying spittle, no paroxysms of rage, no bulging veins here.

3.) Whore.