I saw a subliminal advertising executive, but only for a second.
-Steven Wright

Apparently if you slow Jeff Goldblum down a little bit, he sounds drunk as fuck. Like, Tara Reid drunk.

Also, seriously, is that all they had to go on back then? Macs are not beige? Helluva selling point. I’m convinced.

Speaking of vinyl, see how many BJ faces you can pick out in this old TV-commercial for a Jim Nabors album. Even as a kid, I realized their was something vaguely fruity about his mouth gesticulations, and the middle-school rumor that he and Rock Hudson had been married in a secret ceremony only made it all the more amusing to me.

Of course, like Rock was, Jim is gay, but clearly has avoided promiscuous hot-tub liasons, etc., which may have something to do with his Gomer persona. ‘Cause even if I was gay, I wouldn’t want Gomer puffin’ on my Peter.

Warning: the sounds emerging from this video may induce nausea, vertigo, etc.

“Send $9.98 for 8-track-tape.” Heh. Now that’s one bit of retro Americana I hope no one preserves.

Brother Stink posted a graph that clearly shows how your driving speed will affect your stopping distance in a car with good brakes on a dry road.

This video puts some of that information into a form that makes it a tad more effective.

From a British advert…

I can’t believe that other than a pic Thumb snapped on the highway, there has been no Vern Fonk discussion on the Fist.

Vern Fonk is a Seattle-based insurance company. They insure the uninsurable.

And they’ve got a Thumb like-a-look in their absolutely insane commercials.

Check out more videos after the jump or on the official VF youtube profile.

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I love this ad. Especially when the girl says, “who are you callin’ a cootie queen, you LINT LICKer!?!?!?”

It’s tempting to go around talking like this always.

via divine caroline.

Apparently, the Cougar model comes with a built-in bottle opener…