I honestly don’t know how I stumble upon these things. I’m just furiously searching for something on the web, and voila, the oddity is suddenly there, out of the blue. Kind of like a man on a flaming pie in the sky.

UFO Sighting: Bellingham, Washington; Summer 2006

Name: Michael A Foytek

Date of Event: Last Summer 2006, late May, around 8:50pm

Location of Event: Bellingham, Washington North Western USA

Message: Flying humanoid and or an Angel, maybe a UFO? [Or God]

God wants me to write this experience down so others can read it. I feel a connection now with the other world. The super natural life, where we go after we leave our body during death. I want you to experience what I saw while helping my disabled son last summer afternoon.

I was going to pick my son Alan up from taking him to Max Higbee Center where he plays with other disabled people his age, when I looked up into the sky and saw a man with a long white robe and long flowing white hair and beard to match, up in the sky. He was standing on a podium like platform where he was looking down into the town center here in Bellingham, Washington. He was just hovering there over the bay under a cloud, a big white cloud looking down as if he was watching someone in the town center doing something. He was watching very intensely someone doing something as if he was observing a person doing something they were not suppose to do….

The rest here

by Stinkfinger.

Do you want to spend eternity in a giant city, in a mansion of your own made out of plywood and glitter? Want to spend eternity with a dude with a strap on beard and people wearing bedsheets? Want to spend eternity with dead eyed families from the 1950s? Want to spend eternity with a creepy midget who can finally walk?

Well, has Estus Pirkle got a message for YOU!!!

A group of Lemminghamsters are attempting to organize the first all-city snowball fight, ever. And I’ll give them credit for industry and optimism both, because while it does snow here, it is an uncertain proposition at best–and our classic northeaster, blowing-snow scenario makes for unpackable powder. Nevertheless, with proper coordination, and enthusiasm on the part of citizens, it could be a real newsmaker.To learn all about it, see the group’s MySpace page:

http://www.myspace.com/bellinghamsnowballfight

And pass the word on! That’s the only way something like this is going to work. With some enthusiasm, it could be a vision of Springfield’s Snow Day.

This was just too bizarre not to post.
“Hello, you’re awesome, you pussy fart for you.”

The whole room must have smelled of vagina after that.

I… WANT… ONE!!!

Noticing that there was some clear sky around tonight, I popped outside with my binoculars for another look at Comet Holmes just a little while ago. Ended up lying flat on my back on the patio table, because at 11:00 PM it’s just about at zenith. It has definitely expanded in size since I first saw it, several nights ago; in fact, the dust cloud surrounding the comet is now larger than the Earth.

This article succintly describes just what a weirdo comet this is:

A comet has skywatchers around the world buzzing. Comet Holmes drastically increased in brightness between October 23 and 24, 2007. It went from being a 17th magnitude object (completely invisible to the naked eye, and requiring a large telescope to see) to a 2.5 magnitude object (a pretty bright star) in only 42 hours.

To give you an idea just how dramatic an increase that is an astronomical terms, consider this. The way the astromical brightness measurement system works is thus: the smaller the number, the brighter the object. The faintest star visible to the naked eye (to an eagle-eye under the darkest of skies) is mag. 6. The brightest star as seen from Earth is Sirius (the Dog Star) at -1.4. The full moon is about -12, and the sun is about -27. Each magnitude differs from the previous by a factor of about 2.512 So, Holmes increasing from mag. 17 to 2.0 (the peak brilliance) translates to 2.512¹⁵ times brighter

That’s over 1 million times brighter.

The strangest thing is, that comets just don’t behave this way, and that’s the reason for all the fuss. They don’t get intrinsically brighter as they move away from the sun, nor do they make that kind of jump in brightness in 42 hours, even when they’re close to the sun and thawing out. Every year, a handful of punky little comets are visible out there to those with respectable-size telescopes, but the general public never knows about them and certainly can’t see them. This was just another one of those punky little comets - that suddenly got kind of weird on us. Make that really weird. Like setting Mount Everest out in space a few hundred million miles, and being able to see it with your naked eye.

The only possible conclusions at this point are that it either got nailed by a meteoroid, creating a huge expanding dust cloud, or some internal event caused it to have a “blowout.” You are free, however, to imagine some freaky SF scenario involving bug-eyed aliens with preternaturally large heads, but I wouldn’t lay money on that proposition, as per William of Ockham’s famous razor.

Anyway, I fired up Redshift 5 and made a couple sketches for y’all, as close to possible as it appeared 1.) to my naked eye, and 2.) magnified ten times through binoculars (although experience tells me that probably only one in a thousand have even a passing interest in the “Great Beyond.”)

In April of 1960, Joseph Kittinger took a balloon to a height of 31,000 meters, that’s 102,800 feet or 19.46 miles, and he fucking jumped.  He freefell for 4 minutes and 36 seconds before pulling his chute at 18,000 feet.  This was eight months before Yuri Gagarin took a rocket to space for the Soviet Union.

BALLS.  OF.  STEEL.